In the John

Open the door, close it
lock the door I'm free
Content I turn around
Drop my drawers with glee

The seat is so cold
I sit down. It's so clean
Comfortably flip through
the nearest magazine

Get a call from my girl
Pick it up. Might as well
We're only on the phone
She won't detect the smell

I mean what's the point in being
the king upon the throne
If a king is not allowed
to even talk on his phone

End the call, finish the page
And now I'm almost done
I think I've been here for an age
But hey, I had the runs.

Absentmindedly reach for the roll
Oh no, there's nothing there
"I need toilet paper!"
Nobody seems to care

Finally someone comes
But it's been a couple hours
I say "Thanks for bringing some"
as I pull on up my trousers

Wash my hands once or twice
This is like my second bedroom
Cause there is no point in enjoying life
If you can't enjoy the restroom

Without a License

Exhaustion,
stronger when it steals a man's focus
If it didn't exist much less would've broke us
We stood together
We fought the same war
Even today we still have the same core

Doubtless you'd berate me if you knew how I've failed
Condemning criminals from your cell in your jail
You have no experience
Attempt to be insightful
If you beat dead horses life is much more delightful

Angry at you
I'm over feeling frightened
How do you expect to help the army be enlightened
While pissing off the soldiers standing to the side of you
Instead of having your back I watch them hide from you

Blame me for being licensed
When I crash the car
Refuse to get behind the wheel
You couldn't get that far
I'd rather drive away from you while risking the danger
Than rot here with you
To me you're a stranger.